The past month and a half has been a doozy. I was promoted, went on three cross-country trips and have had little to no time at home with my loved ones. In reading my blog entries over the past few months, it is clear this has become a pattern. Back in March, I wrote about a similar busy period and my realization that I was just going through the motions instead of trying to be fully present to get through my stress.
Well, here I sit three months later and I need to confess that I did a lousy job of getting through the past few months using meditation, yoga, breath work and nutrition to help me. Instead, I slipped to meditating once a day (I typically do two); have been struggling to get to yoga; and have not been eating as healthy as I usually do and over indexing on the wine. As a result, I made it through my busy time, but I am exhausted. And I am not talking about passing out in bed at 10pm exhausted. I’m talking passing out on the couch in the middle of the day and not able to move exhausted. I’m talking feeling heavy and fatigued and like I am not even awake exhausted.
To say this is unlike me is an understatement. I never take naps and am used to leading an active lifestyle and doing many things at once. But it is clear my current lifestyle is too much. It is also clear I have been leaning on the wrong tools to get me through. As one of my favorite teachers once said,
“We tend to lean on our vices when we can least afford to.”
The beauty of this life, however, is that every day is a chance to start anew. So, I woke up yesterday and told myself I was going to do a “one day reset.” I went on a walk with my dog, did my yoga (even though I was beat), meditated and did a one day kitchari cleanse. One day of relaxed, mindful living didn’t cure me, but it put me on the right path. So much so that I woke up this morning, went to yoga, opened up to my teacher and bough myself some new herbs – Ashwaganda and CBD – and decided to do another day of kitchari. And my one day reset, suddenly became two.
As for tomorrow, I am going to try not to focus on that, but to think of every day being an opportunity to reset or rewind. I am going to try to approach my days from the lens of what choices would help me reset to a more relaxed, happy self, and what choices will rewind me to my stressed, burnt out self.
I am going to take it one day at a time with the goal of getting through June with this new mentality. I know I need to get back into meditating twice a day; yoga four to five days a week (can aim for 6!); my plant based eating lifestyle; and cutting back on the wine. These are habits that sustain me and make me my best self.
SO this is what I am putting out there. For the month of June, I am going to focus on the above and will blog weekly to tell you how I am doing. I am going to consciously keep track of how I handle stressful moments and when I turn to my “reset” or “rewind” tools and honestly tell you how it goes.